Perhaps you have heard the phrase ‘memento mori‘. It’s Latin for, “remember your death”, and it has been used by various philosophers, Christians and Stoics throughout the centuries as a maxim to remind ourselves of our own morality. Death. It’s the only thing guaranteed in this life besides taxes, and it’s coming for us all eventually.

Memento Mori is not meant to inspire pessimism; it’s meant to inspire a full life. To live knowing that death is coming for you is a philosophical way of life meant to inspire one to live better, and it goes deeper than you may think.

YOUR TIME IS FLEETING

Your time is limited, so maximize your use of it. What have you done with your time? You won’t live forever. Even tomorrow isn’t guaranteed, so live fully each day. Many of us spend our time as if we are going to live forever. We put off that important thing, that conversation, that adventure, that life-changing decision because we think we have all of the time in the world to do it.

Things get left unsaid. We get old and lose our physical strength, or worse, we never made good use of it when we were young. We didn’t take that risk. We settled for mediocrity because ‘some day’ we would get around to it. We lost that relationship because we prioritized material things. We end up with regrets because we didn’t make time for family or friends because we were too busy chasing worldly possessions or prestige.

We assume the people in our lives will always be there, but death takes them too. Did you spend enough time with your loved ones? And the time that you did have, did you make the most of it? Or did you let little things get in the way of loving them as much as you could have? Did you treat them well or did you tolerate them while you did your own thing?

When I was in the fourth grade, my art teacher told me a story about a time that he got into a terrible argument with someone who he loved, and that night they got in a car accident and died. He told us to treat everyone like it’s the last time you will see them because that’s the reality of the world, and he wanted to save us from the guilt and regret that stuck with him from that tragic night.

Life is short. So use your time wisely and employ it in what is truly important. Be grateful for the ones you love and the time you get with them because you never know how long that will be.

GET YOUR PRIORITIES STRAIGHT

The inevitability of death should bring clarity to what you should be prioritizing. That job that you gave all your time and effort to just to have shiny things is not going to matter on your deathbed. You can’t take those shiny things with you. Don’t be that old person living in a retirement home who is lonely and full of regret because they made their life’s focus work and not their loved ones.

Unless you were doing something that impacted the world and changed lives, I promise you that job is not that important. That company will hire someone else when you die. Your family doesn’t take applications for the position of mother, father, brother or sister when you pass on.

Anyone who has had a close call with death will tell you that it is the fastest way to realize how messed up your priorities are. Anyone who has lost a loved one can tell you that they wish they prioritized the time spent together more.

They would tell you that the arguement you had a year ago wasn’t worth the time spent in resentment. Don’t let the little things take your focus off of what’s important. Those little things aren’t going to matter when you die. Don’t sweat the small stuff when it’s not going to be a note in your eulogy. It probably won’t even matter in a year so don’t let it overshadow what’s really important.

Be far-sighted. See all the way to the grave. Consider different aspects of life from your deathbed and your decisions will be far easier. Deciding what’s important and meaningful is easy. Knowing your purpose and assigning your life meaning is easier when you live knowing death can come for you at any time.

LIVE BOLDLY AND VIRTUOUSLY

The remembrance of the inevitability of death is not meant to serve as an excuse to Y.O.L.O. one’s life away and live as if tomorrow had no consequence. The fleeting nature of life should not inspire selfish indulgence but rather virtue. Death does not imply meaninglessness to the strife of life, rather death gives life and all its struggles purpose and beauty, and purpose and beauty are not present in the absence of virtue.

Living without virtue is what leads to regret and suffering. Immorality casts the beauty of life in dark shadows and the immoral wonder why they can’t find joy and beauty. I don’t know about you, but most all my worst moments were a result of not doing what I knew was right. And if I could take those things back, I would.

We don’t always get time to right our wrongs, and when death is at my doorstep, I want to leave this earth knowing that I did my best to live right, and not regret the way I acted or wish that I treated people better.

One can either use the fact that death can take us tomorrow to hold importance to what we say and think and do and to execute all of those things with virtue, or one can use it to excuse our self-gratifying desires, to satisfy the lusts of the flesh. You can party like there’s no tomorrow but when sunrise after sunrise comes and death has yet to call you, what will you have to show for your endeavors but a life hallmarked by hangovers and poor decisions?

That’s not to say one shouldn’t enjoy life, but to treat each day as an opportunity to get it right and to be the best you could be. That way, when death finally comes, you have lived fully and carry with you few regrets. We are all human, and bound to make mistakes, but when we use each day to do our best, we reduce the number of regrets we take with us to the grave.

When you do your best, even if you fail, and you hold nothing back, it’s easier to forgive yourself for falling short. It’s often not what others thought of you that weighs the heaviest on your consciousness, but what you think of yourself, so live boldly.

Bonnie Ware, a former palliative care nurse, wrote about what her patients said were their biggest regrets. Three of the top five regrets had something to do with not living boldly. You can read about it here.

I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.

I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.

I wish that I had let myself be happier.

Don’t leave stones un-turned. Live the life you want to live. Don’t let your dreams pass you by. Don’t live your life afraid to be yourself. Live the life you want to live. It’s too short. It’s too unpredictable. Death is coming for you so why are you so afraid of what other people think? Don’t be so afraid to rock the boat that the journey is boring or that you let someone else choose the destination.

Have the courage to take what you want from life because death is sure as hell going to take you. Fate favors the bold, and the only fate guaranteed to you is a trip to the cemetery. So might as well go for what you want before you get there.

Memento Mori.

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